Hands

As I watch my hands curl over this keyboard, watch fingers reach and hover above the keys of my laptop, I see hands with a different mission than my father’s whose photograph hangs by my desk.

My father sits in the foreground in a bass fishing boat—most likely some time following his stroke—in his late seventies. His left hand is hidden from view, maybe he is reaching for the tiller of the motor ready to start the outboard and head to a new fishing spot, or maybe he and my brother are just drifting along the edge of this backwater lake in southeastern North Carolina. His right arm rests on his thigh with his fingers lightly twisted around a fishing rod.Carl fishing in Sutton Lake

He sits in repose with the heel of the lightweight rod at rest on the boat’s bottom. His fingers hold the rod as if the whole matter of fishing is rather incidental to the being there—the physical occupation of this space on this small boat on this expanse of water. Since he occupies the foreground, most of the picture is background. It is a quiet sunny day, and there is only a light ripple in the blue water behind him. The trees and bushes stretch out above him receding into the distance. My eye follows where he has been. He is toward the end of his journey. Yet it is his hand in repose that interests me.

His hands were the hands of a workingman. He worked outside almost all of his younger life as a lineman and then as an electrician for the Civil Aeronautics Association and a private electrical contractor, Tally Electric, before starting his own electrical contracting business when I was in high school. By the time he was in his seventies, his hands were crusty and red from long exposure to the southern sun.

The forefinger of his right hand was crooked—bending toward his palm slightly and a bit to the right. He joked and said that when he pointed at something he had to make a slight adjustment because if the viewer followed the angle of his finger, the object would be the wrong one. How did he hurt that finger? Was it in the fight he told me about when he was a young man? Or was it when he smashed it with a sledge-hammer in a construction accident?

One day in Minnesota when I was filling my gas tank on a cold winter day, I banged the forefinger of my own right hand on the gas lid. It was a frigid day—way below freezing–and my hands were numb. So I didn’t realize until several days later that my finger had formed into the exact same tilt as my father’s and never did straighten out.

My hands also show the effect of a childhood spent in the sun—the skin is wrinkled. Even when I was in college they had already begun to age. I remember a boyfriend holding my hands and saying, “What’s happening to your hands?” Yet mine are not the hands of a workingwoman—at least not those of someone who worked as my father did outside. Mine are the hands of a teacher, a mother, and now a grandmother. As a mother and teacher, my hands were sometimes covered with eczema—a red rash from the chalk on the blackboards aggregated by dishwater from cleaning up after our family of five. Then there was a callous on the inside of the middle finger of my left hand—a callous from holding the pen and writing comments on thousands of student papers.IMG_8653

Years ago when I lifted my new granddaughter, Ella, out of her high chair, she wrapped her hand around my bent finger. Her fingers were small and perfect and as smooth as the inside of a porcelain teacup. Mine are puckered with veins covered by loose crepe paper skin. Yet still these fingers of mine are agile enough to stretch over the black and white ivories of my new piano and to move across the letters of this laptop.

As my hands float over the keyboard, they seem to be a direct link to a stream of images. They are being asked to transform pictures from the past into meaning. They form words to reflect on the moving water of time—a different, more abstract place than the one my father’s boat rests upon in that lake where he fished.

In the picture of my father, I see that he wears the navy blue coveralls that were his signature attire and a beige fishing hat with a back flap to keep the sun off his neck. He has a look of readiness as if he knows that with the next spot on the lake and the next cast he will catch that bass. But if he doesn’t, that’s okay too because at the bottom of the picture is a big red ice chest full of cold drinks and maybe a cheese sandwich. There’s a lot of space behind him—and time—but he’s at peace it seems. I like that in the photograph he is up close and that if he put down the fishing rod, he could reach across and take my hand.

____________________________

“Stretch forth your open hands,/ Take all the gifts that Death and Life may give.”                                                                      –William Morris, The Earthly Paradise. March.

____________________________

Writing Idea:  Many artists practice sketching hands. Each person’s hands tell a story. Try a word sketch of your hand or someone else’s. Maybe you can use a photo and do a word sketch of the person and his/her hands.  Go where it takes you.

12 thoughts on “Hands

  1. What a wonderful prompt and a heartfelt word photo of your father. I liked it a lot. I watch my hands a lot although never when I’m typing – I watch the words on the screen or on the paper. I watch my hands, however, when I’m kneading bread and I always think of my grandmother’s hands. I’ve written about her hands and me kneading bread. My hands are shaped like hers, square and strong, except she had the tips of two middle fingers chopped off by an errant hatchet when a girl. Her brother, she told me, was chopping off a chicken’s head but got her fingers. I never asked for more details as I might today.

    • Good to hear from you, Janet. Hands do tell stories!
      I have memories of my grandmother pulling a chicken out of a wooden crate and wringing its neck. Then steaming off the feathers by her back porch. Talk about fresh chicken for dinner! She never lost any fingers.

  2. As usual, a beautifully written piece. I hear your voice (the one you’re always telling your students they have) in every line. Your stories always appear to be effortlessly written, whether they are or not. They never seem forced or contrived, but wholly natural and organic. A perfect reflection of the writer.

    • Thank you, Arlene. I’m glad the piece seemed effortless. It has been brewing for a long time. I’m gathering some pieces that I’ve written for a collection and found this one. I did have to re-work it. It’s hard to disguise my voice, I guess. That southern drawl, maybe?

      • Don’t all writers want their voices to come through? We were in class in St. Petersburg, Vicki, when one of the “young” students commented: “When I heard you read at Open Mic, that was the voice I had heard in your story.” Wow!, I thought. I’ve found my writing voice at last.

        • I remember that reading, Carol. I liked that story–and that voice–so much. It’s still hard to believe that we all traveled to Russia that summer–for our writing! Unforgettable. So glad!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *